


Rituals

by oneatatime



Category: Kamen Rider Kuuga
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-13
Updated: 2015-03-13
Packaged: 2018-03-17 15:17:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3534275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oneatatime/pseuds/oneatatime
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Words that can't be said. </p><p> </p><p>(set post series)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rituals

**Author's Note:**

  * For [CurryJolokia](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CurryJolokia/gifts).



Twelve days, this time.

Godai's not sure if it's okay. Not really. He knows he needs to go, he knows Ichijou-san would yell at him for even _considering_ staying around forever, he knows that he's been careful to stay in touch and to be a little more reliable, a little more predictable, to make it easier on Ichijou-san.

But is it really enough?

He puts away his unease for the moment, masks it with a brightly gentle smile when Ichijou-san opens the door to him. This is his sixth or seventh return since Daguva's defeat. They have something of a ritual going by now. Mutual understanding. Godai even uses the door. 

(Well, except for the time when he'd arrived a day earlier than expected, exhausted from a lack of sleep - camel herders are delightful people but they do like to talk! Ichijou-san had been finishing a 20 hour shift and logically wasn't home to answer his door. Godai'd showered, fallen asleep in Ichijou-san's bed still looking like ten miles of bad road, and had woken up at the end of Ichijou-san's pistol with Godai's little elderly phone in Ichijou-san's other hand, flashing something at him about how it'd saved his message to Ichijou-san as a draft.)

(He could never hold onto phones for long.) 

Godai doesn't kiss him, doesn't get into his space too much. Just says, "Hello," happily, then follows him inside.

Godai keeps up low key chatter about this and that as Ichijou-san potters about making them both tea. Ichijou-san responds now and then, with a note about the weather, a comment about Enokida-san's latest achievements. Godai's appreciative. Doesn't push. 

They sit at the table, sip their tea, and fall into silence for a while.

When they sit down later to watch a movie (some dreadful old musical - Godai loves them), Godai goes first. He sits on the floor, a few inches from the couch, room in front, behind, and next to him. The carpet is thin, but Godai's warm enough. He doesn't know how much of that is the company, and how much is that he's not quite human any more. Doesn't seem to matter. 

He can find a home anywhere, but nowhere feels quite like Ichijou-san's house. 

...Ichijou-san sits down behind him, which is a first.

Godai scoots back a little, and when Ichijou-san's hand stays on Ichijou-san's knee for a time, Godai covers it with his own, then he pulls it to his stomach. 

"Tchh, Godai -"

"Don't interrupt the movie," Godai says earnestly, fumbling for Ichijou-san's other hand. He places it on his stomach, too, covers them both with his own hands, and leans back against Ichijou-san's strength with a sigh of relief. 

If there's a small shudder, Godai doesn't say anything. 

(Ichijou-san doesn't comment on the breath catching in Godai's throat, after all.)

Godai finds sleep hard to come by sometimes these days, and in a way he's pleased when Ichijou-san joins him on his little balcony at three a.m. The stiffness has mostly gone from the other man's movements. But not entirely. "When do you leave again?" 

It's _I love you_ and _I need you_ and _If you hurt yourself to account for either of those two things, I'll eviscerate you_ , all in one.

"I don't know for sure. I think about three weeks," Godai says, looking up at the stars. The occasional little whiff of cloud scuds across the sky, briefly blocking out the moon. This part isn't out of the ritual, but maybe it should be. Change can be good. "Come with me?" 

He looks back when there's no sound, and sees Ichijou-san with his arms folded tightly around himself, face a mask.

Shit.

There's a time to push, and a time not to, and he knows - thinks - this might be a time to push. They're so alike in some ways. He wraps his arms around Ichijou-san, not gripping too tightly, to let Ichijou-san keep his arms where they are or move them or whatever. "You have vacation time," he says softly into Ichijou-san's ear. "Or we could go for the weekend, only. I know you can't come with me every time, but I'd like you to come sometimes? There are lots of good places to wander not too far from here, and you can pick if you want, and-" 

"Shut _up_ ," Ichijou-san groans, and then his lips are on Godai's and he's being pushed back against the railing. 

Oh. Oh, this is nice, too.

He's not sure about many things. About how much he's hurting Ichijou-san by being himself, about how much Ichijou-san needs him and can't admit it, about how much he needs Ichijou-san when he used to be perfectly happy largely alone (though that last part is unalloyed good). 

But he's sure about Ichijou-san being part of his life, and travelling with him sometimes. And he's definitely sure about Ichijou-san kissing him so fervently, his hands in Godai's hair, all traces of previous tension gone. 

Yes, this definitely needs to become part of the ritual.


End file.
